It took me a while to say yes to this utterly beautiful and intense course, but here I am, I am a student again. An online training that will keep me busy for about 600 hours this year learning everything about Sex, Love and Relationships. I am so so so excited and happy and looking forward for all that is too come. However, last week I was challenged to the max. Old pains, old patterns, getting sick of experiencing feeling being humiliated by a man that got my trust and (mis)used it in the end to satisfy his ego. Or at least that is how I experienced it. It all has to do with Love. This week showed me again that the one only constant I have to go back to is loving myself. Deeply, without being scared of what other people might think. I have decided to pick up writing, or blogging. To journal my journey and to start being more visible in what I believe is needed in the world. So this is the start. And today I share a part of the syllabus that helped me to feel and be the Queen of Love that we were asked to be (nice homework we got :):
‘No matter what happens to your heart, the purity of love always remains at the core of you. Pain and trauma can only obstruct the incredible love that is always there.
Your heart is actually never fully broken. It’s just the mechanism that allows your heart to function and thrive that can be broken. Your heart is never closed; rather, it is the mechanism around your heart that shuts down so you no longer feel inside.
It’s important to remember that the heart needs to have a mechanism that can close and open. Always only having an open heart is like jamming the doorway open and letting anything through at any time. What you want is a freely swinging door that can open or shut in a healthy, thriving way. What most of us end up with is a door that gets jammed shut for too long and no longer freely swings open. A lot of heart work is really about restoring the protective mechanism of the heart that supports it to function and thrive. That way, you have a heart that can safely approach life from a space of compassion and love, and that closes when it is truly appropriate to do so.
But the heart itself is always there. Staying connected with this untouched love within you is the key to claiming your joy, innocence, and boundless love.
The heart is known as the “queen” of the organs. When the heart thrives, so does the entire body.’
All the love to you, team Layla Martin, for creating a loving, safe and healing space for this awesome journey!