I have waited for the biggest #metoo storm to pass, one the hand because I often need more time to let things sink in and on the other hand because I felt an inner conflict. One voice told me all the time that I MUST write something, since She Blooms is all about female sexuality. The other voice whispered softly that I did not have too, only if I really felt like.
She Blooms is all about sharing and female sexuality. So you would say that I would make a happy dance to celebrate that women are speaking up, and are sharing their voices. And yes I am, but I am also not.
Because, yes, me too. Like lots of other women and men in this world I have been touched by people when I did not necessarily wanted too. I have sometimes frozen not able to set any boundaries. And yes it has created fear, and a mistrust in for me, men. I even want to take it further, because highly sensitive people can have the idea of being sexually assaulted when it never physically happened. Sometimes a thought is already enough to make them experience or feel sexually abused, while the other party only had the thought of doing so. I would like to call that an energetic assault, or rape even. But what do you want to do about this? Changing thoughts? Thoughts that cannot really be controlled? Or can they?
So yes, I do believe that stories should be shared, to get things out of someone’s system. To release shame, guilt, tension, and the embarrassment and insecurity that comes along with it. To get back in touch with one’s body, because what often happens when a pain is to intense is that the soul leaves the body and the connection with the self is lost.
While writing this post I have come to realize that my most powerful and healing sharing was with my mom. And guess what, #shetoo.
That brings me to one of my biggest questions, and that is if social media is the platform to share personal abuse stories. I believe that opening up on this topic is so vulnerable and can touch so many deep wounds, that a safe place is super important. To share your story with someone you trust, who is there for you in person, that is physically there. And will also be there in the next week, month or year. Because healing takes time.
Another thing that bothers me in the whole movement is the division between men and women. Because, guess what, #hetoo. I believe we have come to an era where we are collectively healing the wounds of humanity. A deeply rooted universal pain that is caused by acting out of an anxious ego. We have been suppressing the real feminine and masculine energy. That is where it is about. And as soon as we are dividing men and women, we are trapped in the illusion of separation. There is no we and them. There is only an us. The moment we are starting to blame other people, we are blaming ourselves. Because who is the victim, and who is the perpetrator? Aren’t we all both in a way? Isn’t the universe asking us to rise up and see behind words, behind identities? Because by blaming other people you are doing the same as what you have experienced, you judge from your frame of reference. Wouldn’t it be better to ask questions? To listen to other peoples inner pains as well?
Because like Pamela Kribbe, I do believe that aggression and violence comes from an unopened heart and a lack of a base filled with self love. And that a lack of real connection lies underneath. That experiencing a contactless life creates violence.
So I do think that the whole #metoo movement is a ply for real connection, from the heart. And that is where the feminine energy comes in. Both, men and women, need to reconnect with themselves, with their worthiness and with their real feminine energy: with feeling, the intuition and the heart. To connect without the illusion of separation. We are all one.